Monday, June 13, 2011

Some modern and changed definitions of present days

Old meanings have changed by the course of time,and replaced by BRAND NEW.

1. Life Insurance : A contract that keeps you poor all of your life so that you can die rich.

2. School : A place where papa pays and son plays

3. Nurse : A person who wakes you up to give sleeping pills.

4. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a
woman gains her masters.

5. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

6. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through 'the minds of either'.

7. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

8. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

9. Dictionary : A place where success comes before work.

10. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody
disagrees later on.

11. Father: A banker provided by nature.

12. Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

13. Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

14. Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

15. Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.

16. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight

17. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

18. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

19. Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

20. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that
nothing can be done together.

21. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

22. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

24. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after.

Coffee Time::
Ten kids jumped into swimming pool.
Suddenly, all water disappears?
NEW HUGGIES ULTRA absorbs all.


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